Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Yes, this is my second post today. Just got to know that a friend of mine delivered a baby girl. I admire her guts for doing in what she believed it. Can't reveal her name, because she its her personal life and I am no one to make it public. But I admire the fact that she had determination in having her own baby, at any cost. I think, every woman goes through such biological phase when they feel the urge of motherhood. She is 38 and she is no different. Like most of Mumbaikars, she too, would travel from one end of this city to another end, in local train. She braved all the seasons - the riots, the bandhs and the blasts.
Being a working woman she faced all regular hurdles, she managed it pretty well. This city, is such a sucker. You are drained out by the end of the day. I guess, every city does the same. But this city makes you brave and bold. I see so many of them. Travelling in a bus, or crowded train, auto-rickshaws, taxis. The lady about whom I am writing used to travel from Bhayendar to Nariman Point, five days a week. She would take a ferry from Madh Island, and then take a rickshaw to reach Andheri station and from Andheri she would take a train to Churchgate station and from there she would take a cab to reach office at Nariman Point. She would make her own tiffin, because she didn't want to eat outside food. She would go for regular check ups with her doctor. And she was doing all this, alone.
I have no idea, where her husband is. What is he doing? In such stories, husbands doesn't really matter. What matters most, is someone's will. She worked till yesterday, and today she delivered a baby. She is also determined that she will join work after two months of maternity leave. She can't afford to sit at home. Such luxuries are not meant for working woman like her. She needs to repay her loans, she wants to educate her child, give her the best education. And all these comes at a cost, rather heavy cost.
I think, in many aspects, almost every aspect, women are more powerful than men. I just can't imagine myself travelling from one room to another if I am carrying a 3 pound baby in my womb.
She reminds me of many such single mothers in this city. I know a friend of mine, who is planning to quit her job because she needs to take care of her child. Sneha (name changed) works in entertainment industry. She is a single mother, who is planning to get divorced. She runs her own kitchen, and she does that pretty well. But recently, she came to know that the lady who used to baby seat her daughter won't be able to continue. Her husband needs to get operated, and she won't be able to take care of kids. Sneha tried to find out alternative, but nothing worked out. Places which were available were too costly, so she decided to give up her job and stay back home. "What else can I do?" she told me. "I can't leave my daughter with some unknown people. Her school gets over by 2pm and I come home by 7pm. She won't be able to stay all alone for so long," she added.
Such sacrifice is praiseworthy. Will a father leave his job and sit home? I have my serious doubts. Sneha will be freelancing from home, taking care of her daughter's education and meanwhile figure out a solution. "I need a job, I can't sit at home," she rues. "I want to give her the best possible education. And I also need to grow as a professional," she added. She is not depending on her husband, and that's what gives her the courage to survive in this society. She bought her own little pad, she adopted a street dog, she takes care of her old mother. Such a perfect lady.
I am talking about, just two of them. I am sure, you guys must be meeting or knowing hundreds of them. Being a couple is definitely a bliss. But, being single, is no curse. When you know, you have no one to fall back upon, you become stronger.
This city, matures you. Teaches you, how to live with a smile in your face. I adore, all of them.